My little buddy H just finished kindergarten and I am sadder than I realized. I can’t believe the year is over already. It seems like just yesterday I was putting him on the bus for the very first time. I realize every parent says this and has the same feelings but this is happening to me. It is days like today that I realize just how much of my life is beyond my control. I want to be able to stop time, freeze a moment and just enjoy it. These moments are flying by so fast and I can’t slow them down. I am reaching for them but all I end up with is just wisps of air…and my photographs.
I think what has made this sad for me is that it is one of the first steps towards H growing up. Of H not needing me. I realize there will come a day when I will die and he will keep on living. That’s the way these things are supposed to work. But it scares me. He is so little and I never want to leave him. Silly, I know, I need to relax, but I think about these things.
It seems like I spent many years wandering and when I had my son, I realized my true purpose. To be as good a father as possible. I am trying. Sure, there are a few things I wish I could do differently but the core things, I feel I have made the choices that are right for our family.
But as I see him get off the yellow school bus, bringing him home from kindergarten for the last time, I realize that we are one year closer to him growing up and being independent. Yes, I know he’ll always need me but not like he needs me in these first ten years. So I am a little sad. These moment are moving by so quickly. All I have are my memories and my pictures. Here are a few from this past school year.
by Jonathon
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